There's a restaurant that's heard that Vowelburger™ riddles don't satiate like they used to, so it's decided to start selling more sophisticated burgers.

The menu says they sell a False Vowelburger™, a Real Vowelburger™, and a Lookalike Vowelburger™. You know that each burger comes with three buns and two meat choices, in the order bun-meat-bun-meat-bun, with the same type and order of buns on each. Oddly, though, the menu won't tell you what the meats are...

$$ \def\S#1#2{\Space{#1}{20px}{#2px}}\def\P#1{\V{#1em}}\def\V#1{\S{#1}{9}} \def\T{\textbf{Meats}}\def\NT{\textbf{Vowelburger}^{\;\!™}\ }\displaystyle \smash{\lower{29px}\bbox[yellow]{\phantom{\rlap{rubio.2020.01.21-custom}\S{5px}{0} \begin{array}{cc}\T&\NT\\\end{array}}}}\atop\def\V#1{\S{#1}{5}} \begin{array}{|c|c|}\hline\T&\NT\\\hline % ~\text{?, ?}&\text{False}\\\hline ~\text{?, ?}&\text{Real}\\\hline ~\text{?, ?}&\text{Lookalike}\\\hline \end{array}$$

But you're a Vowelburger™ veteran. Can you guess what the meats are without looking at the menu?


While the other two should be doable, I realized after posting that the clue for "Real" is extremely obscure. The connection comes from quantum mechanics, but even if you Google "real qubit" (which is what the term is), the term is so obscure that finding it will still require some digging. I realize this makes for a poor puzzle, so I apologize for that. I'll wait until tomorrow and then post the one term if no one finds it.


As a marketing ploy, the restaurant's strategy team was also thinking of instituting a Secret Vowelburger™. Can you tell them why it would be a bad idea because the CIA would come knocking?

p.s. I reused the template from the last Vowelburgers™ riddle. You can find other Vowelburgers™ Riddles here. Find the first one here. Note that buns = consonants and meats = vowels still.

  • $\begingroup$ +10 for variety, if I could :) $\endgroup$ – Avi Feb 28 at 21:16
  • $\begingroup$ This feels like a good variation on the theme... $\endgroup$ – Stiv Feb 28 at 21:22
  • $\begingroup$ I will say upfront that I think this is very hard. $\endgroup$ – anodyne Feb 28 at 21:45
  • $\begingroup$ I thought it would be rot13(IRANY sbe SNYFR (orgenlvat qhgl guebhtu pbeehcgvba) naq IVALY sbe n jbbq ybbxnyvxr), but I couldn't find a 3rd one. $\endgroup$ – Avi Feb 28 at 21:53
  • $\begingroup$ I just realized, after doing some Googling, that the "real" clue is extremely obscure - sorry about that. I am adding a hint to hopefully make this more doable. $\endgroup$ – anodyne Feb 28 at 22:10

Perhaps the answers are

REBUT (provide evidence that a thing is false),
REBIT (a real analogue of the qubit; see e.g. here), and
ROBOT (a lookalike human, at least in some cases).

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  • $\begingroup$ I should make it explicit that this was done after anodyne posted the hint. $\endgroup$ – Gareth McCaughan Feb 28 at 23:10
  • $\begingroup$ Might be it, I think :) $\endgroup$ – Avi Feb 28 at 23:10
  • $\begingroup$ @anodyne You missed an opportunity for a Moroccan tagine burger here ;-) $\endgroup$ – Stiv Feb 29 at 6:44
  • $\begingroup$ @Stiv I love it. :) I had that one in for awhile but couldn't come up with anything to go with the false/real theme so I took it out :/ $\endgroup$ – anodyne Feb 29 at 16:04

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