Divide them into 3 groups of 4 people.
Put any two groups on each side of the see-saw. (First Use)
Condition 1
If the see-saw balances, we are sure that the oddly wieghted one is in the other group of 4.
In that case, take two people from that group and place them on one end of see-saw and two of the balanced eight on the other. (Second Use)
Condition 1.1
If the see saw balances, remove all but one from the seesaw and put one of the remaining two opposite them. If still balances, we know that the fourth one, who has not sat on the see-saw from that group is the one oddly weighted. (Third Use)
Condition 1.2
If the see saw is not balanced, remove one from each end. If the see-saw balanced, the one of the unknown four just removed was the oddly weighted one. Otherwise the one who stayed is the oddly weighted one.(Third Use)
Condition 2
If the two groups of 4 don't balance remember which side was lighter, have three get off one end and the remaining person swap places with one of the other four. Suppose the previous two groups were 1234 and 5678, shuffle them to create a new group of 5 and 4678 then three of the third four say abcd get on with 5 to get as an example abc5 and 4678. (Second Use)
Condition 2.1.1
If the position of seesaw does not change and as an example say 5678 and then 4678 are heavier, we know that either 6 or 7 or 8 is oddly weighted. Now put 7 on one end and 8 on the other. If one is heavier they are the odd one otherwise it is 6. (Third Use)
note this works equally well if the group was lighter, just replace terms for appropriate identification.
Condition 2.1.2
If the seesaw reverses, ether 4 or 5 is the oddly weighted one. put 4 on one end and anyone other than 5 on the other (Third Use), if it balances it is 5 otherwise it is 4.
Condition 2.1.3
If the seesaw balances we know that either 1 or 2 or 3 is oddly weighted. Say as example 1234 were lighter. Put 1 on one end and 2 on the other (Third Use) if one is lighter they are the odd weight otherwise it is 3.
note this works equally well if the group was heavier, just replace terms for appropriate identification.
Done - easy peasy
It is easier than everyone makes it. A seesaw is binary. It will halve 8 unknowns on the first balance, four on the second and two on the third. Set it up so deduction eliminates everything else and your gold.
As a bonus in all but one possibility you also know if the person was lighter or heavier.
(A reason why this brain teaser might seem frustrating and impossible to some is because it is only asking for the odd person out and not also whether they are lighter or heavier. It is impossible to know both for sure in only three steps.)
Edit:
In 11/12 cases you know whether the person is lighter or heavier as the seasaw dictates it. The only case where you don’t is 1.1.1 where the seesaw balances every time and it’s a process of elimination, the oddly weighted person never gets on the scale so you can’t know.