9
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If you know me, you're in danger.
If others know me, you're in danger.

Ignorance is bliss, you're safer forgetting me.
As soon as you know me, good luck.

If you know me, you hate me.
It's better that you forget.

As soon as you know, you can't resist.
You need to tell someone what happened, it's the rule.

Ever present, but undetected. I'll never stop. My only weakness is the British Prime Minister, only he can end me.

Who am I?

"I hate you" is not an answer, but you may put it in your comments/answers if you really do.
A better question would be "What am I?"

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  • $\begingroup$ It's not "Brexit" is it? :-P $\endgroup$ – Rand al'Thor Jan 9 at 12:44
  • $\begingroup$ Nope. Not even close. $\endgroup$ – CStafford-14 Jan 9 at 12:44
12
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Please beware before reading the spoilers, you are in danger.

I think you are

The Game

If you know me, you're in danger.

Whenever one thinks about The Game, one loses.

If others know me, you're in danger.

Losses must be announced. This can be verbally, with a phrase such as "I just lost The Game".

Ignorance is bliss, you're safer forgetting me.

If you forget about The Game, you're winning

As soon as you know me, good luck.

You lose

If you know me, you hate me.

As you are always losing

It's better that you forget.

As soon as you know, you can't resist.
You need to tell someone what happened, it's the rule.

Yes, rule 3 on the linked page.

Ever present, but undetected. I'll never stop. My only weakness is the British Prime Minister, only he can end me.

The common rules do not define a point at which The Game ends. However, some players state that The Game ends when the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom announces on television that "The Game is up."

Finally, I announce that

I just lost The Game

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  • $\begingroup$ Guess I have to wait another 8 minutes before I can accept this as correct. Too easy, I guess... $\endgroup$ – CStafford-14 Jan 9 at 12:45
  • $\begingroup$ @CStafford-14 Possibly just a bit lucky. I had not heard the bit about the British Prime Minister before. Just found out. $\endgroup$ – hexomino Jan 9 at 12:47
  • 1
    $\begingroup$ well poop, I just lost too $\endgroup$ – AHKieran Jan 9 at 13:32
  • 2
    $\begingroup$ Aw, nuts... Guess what I just did? CURSE YOU, HEXOMINO!! ;-) $\endgroup$ – Stiv Jan 9 at 13:34
  • 1
    $\begingroup$ And I just lost the game! Dang! $\endgroup$ – Paul Karam Jan 10 at 6:19
4
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I knew it!

Boris Johnson is having an affair with my wife!

If you know me, you're in danger.

I can't keep that information to myself. This marriage is over!

If others know me, you're in danger.

I have loyal friends, they'd be honest with me about what's going on.

Ignorance is bliss, you're safer forgetting me.

Good advice from Dan Savage

As soon as you know me, good luck.

See above.

If you know me, you hate me.

Well, obviously.

It's better that you forget.

Yes, I agree.

As soon as you know, you can't resist.

You're right, I would confront my wife.

You need to tell someone what happened, it's the rule.

A problem shared is a problem halved.

Ever present, but undetected. I'll never stop. My only weakness is the British Prime Minister, only he can end me.

I think BoJo is enough of a meanie to call me and gloat that he's having an affair. This is the worst news. Really, wife? Boris?!

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  • $\begingroup$ Nope... sorry! You might want to check the correct answer to see what you missed unless you want to try again. +1 for effort. $\endgroup$ – CStafford-14 Jan 10 at 1:05
  • 8
    $\begingroup$ Too late, I've already started divorce proceedings. $\endgroup$ – sam-w Jan 10 at 1:08

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