9
$\begingroup$

I have big news! I finally have a girlfriend! She's really nice and is studying to be a cartographer. As you know, I don't have much experience with the ladies, so I need some advice.

I have been sensing that things are not going well, and when I asked her what was wrong, she emailed me the attached map. She said that if I couldn't figure out what it meant, then I should probably ask you.

Any Ideas?

Your loving son,

Chowzen

Map
Click To Enlarge

A correct answer will specifically identify the four points A B C D on the map as they pertain to the above letter.

As a bonus, you could suggest what a carefully worded response from Dear Old Dad would look like. :)

Improve this question
$\endgroup$
1
  • 1
    $\begingroup$ The premise for this made me think of this gem (warning: non-PG language) $\endgroup$
    – HTM
    Commented Sep 16, 2019 at 5:10

2 Answers 2

Reset to default
4
$\begingroup$

The route is indeed in Pennsylvania.
A: VIRGINVILLE
B: BLUE BALL
C: INTERCOURSE
D: CLIMAX
It would appear you're having trouble satisfying her in bed, due to your lack of sexual experience. A response might be Lickdale? Woodcock? There's a surprising amount of choice for Dear Old Dad here.

Improve this answer
$\endgroup$
4
$\begingroup$

I can't finish it, but:

This is a route in Pennsylvania
(I recognized the Appalachian folds and the interstates between Altoona and Harrisburg)
I think:
D=Dayton (=Dating)
C=Lancaster (=???)
B=Ephrata (=afraid of)
A=Kutztown (=cuts town ??)

Improve this answer
$\endgroup$
5
  • 1
    $\begingroup$ Other relevant locations that could correspond to the markers are, in ABCD order, rot13(ivetvaivyyr, oyhr onyy, vagrepbhefr, evattbyq). $\endgroup$
    – hdsdv
    Commented Sep 16, 2019 at 5:56
  • $\begingroup$ @hdsdv - I didn't know there were so many funny names there, but those look a bit too far East to me (but I don't have map overlay) -- there's already a bad joke about going from rot13(vagrepbhefr gb pyvznk); would Chowzen go there? $\endgroup$
    – amI
    Commented Sep 16, 2019 at 6:25
  • $\begingroup$ Yeah - I was doing my best to line up "landmarks" but I'm not confident about any of them. I kind of zoomed in on the area that looked most correct and then looked for relevant names in the region. I'm not sure how to proceed from there. $\endgroup$
    – hdsdv
    Commented Sep 16, 2019 at 6:34
  • 2
    $\begingroup$ I looked at the map and I thought the markers were: rot13(ivetvaivyyr, oyhr onyy, vagrepbhefr, naq pyvznk) $\endgroup$
    – JS1
    Commented Sep 16, 2019 at 9:20
  • 2
    $\begingroup$ "Can't finish?" my condolences. :) $\endgroup$
    – Chowzen
    Commented Sep 16, 2019 at 11:21

Your Answer

By clicking “Post Your Answer”, you agree to our terms of service and acknowledge you have read our privacy policy.

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.