9
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I loiter around all day,

Until you kick me out for the week,

You may invite me back in until I've evened out.

I will always be back to linger your way,

Gruff, big, small, and chic,

Those are all forms of me, no doubt!

Near a parenthesis like thing, I lay.

And cutting edge technology, a nemesis name it reek(s).

Lastly, I just sit here waiting for every scrap that doesn't find its route.

What am I?

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  • 1
    $\begingroup$ Interesting Riddle (+1) :D $\endgroup$ – Kevin L Sep 4 '18 at 3:22
  • $\begingroup$ Thought 1: Backpack Thought 2: Garbage Can $\endgroup$ – Duck Sep 4 '18 at 4:41
  • 1
    $\begingroup$ you pronounce 'route' as 'rowt' not 'root' then? does ABCABCABC have an official rhyme name? $\endgroup$ – JMP Sep 4 '18 at 5:17
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I think you are:

Facial Hair

I loiter around all day,

Doesn't really do anything for you

Until you kick me out for the week,

You might trim your facial hair once a week

You may invite me back in until I've evened out.

I will always be back to linger your way,

You can even it out, but then it grows back and gets in the way.

Gruff, big, small and chic, Those are all forms of me, no doubt!

Different styles of facial hair.

Near a parenthesis like thing, I lay.

Your mouth. Has a slight curve to it and it opens and closes.

And cutting edge technology, a nemesis name it reek(s).

Cutting edge technology is a pun, not sure about the second part.

Lastly, I just sit here waiting for every scrap that doesn't find its route.

Food crumbs could get stuck in your beard/mustache if they miss your mouth.

Title:

I "mustache" you this

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  • $\begingroup$ Great! Your second guess is correct! :D $\endgroup$ – QuantumTwinkie Sep 4 '18 at 18:22
  • $\begingroup$ If you need guidance for the rest of it just ask for a hint :) $\endgroup$ – QuantumTwinkie Sep 4 '18 at 18:38
  • $\begingroup$ I think I could use a hint on the "a nemesis name it reek(s)" part. Is everything else right? @QuantumTwinkie $\endgroup$ – Chris Sep 4 '18 at 19:12
  • $\begingroup$ That part just refers to rot13(Vg vf gur rarzl orpnhfr vg funirf n zhfgnpur be orneq.) :D $\endgroup$ – QuantumTwinkie Sep 4 '18 at 19:29
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    $\begingroup$ @QuantumTwinkie Haha, I didn't even notice the hint in the title. I like it! $\endgroup$ – Chris Sep 4 '18 at 19:35
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Are you..

Litter?

I loiter around all day,

litter lies around. 'loiter' is also very close to 'litter'

Until you kick me out for the week,

The weekly garbage disposal

You may invite me back in till I've evened out.
I will always be back to linger your way,

You'll soon have litter again

Gruff, big, small and chic,
Those are all forms of me, no doubt!

Litter can have many forms, almost anything can become litter at some point

Near a parenthesis like thing, I lay.

maybe the skip, or the trashcan?

And cutting edge technology, a nemesis name it reek(s).

Twitter? I don't see how this is a nemesis though.. Litter surely reeks.

Lastly, I just sit here waiting for every scrap that doesn't find its route.

If new scrap misses the trash can ("doesn't find it's route"), it becomes litter by definition.

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  • $\begingroup$ Sorry incorrect :) +1 $\endgroup$ – QuantumTwinkie Sep 4 '18 at 13:51
1
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partial:

Oddball

Until you kick me out for the week,

Balls can be kicked

You may invite me back in till I've evened out.

In order to 'even out' you have to be 'odd'

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  • $\begingroup$ Sorry incorrect, :) +1 $\endgroup$ – QuantumTwinkie Sep 4 '18 at 13:51

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