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Riddle me this:

If you want to find me, then here's my suggestion:

You must look in a barnyard and forget the question.

Fill the gap with yourself, but do not change the sound;

And then move your eyes west and I will be found.

But wait — my memory's not straight, rather curved!

Please order the take-out where refreshments are served.

It should all be complete, but my head is all soaked.

Sometimes there's dirt; sometimes there's smoke!

Now the crosses have turned — it is time for the running;

Bubbles are bubbling, and droplets are drumming.

What am I?

The title is a clue,
(As well as being true).


Hint 1:

From setter's perspective.
It was in a long shower,
Where I thought of the answer.

Hint 2:

Rule of Thumb: ONE.

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  • $\begingroup$ @Rubio $\diamondsuit$ ah yes, sorry, I keep forgetting. $\endgroup$ – Feeds Jul 16 '18 at 7:25
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Are you:

a DRAIN

If you want to find me, then here's my suggestion:
You must look in a barnyard and forget the question.

We start with the word "barnyard". The "question" in the word barnyard is the letter Y (Why), so we start by removing that and we have BARN ARD. Credit to @Jafe for solving this.

Fill the gap with yourself, but do not change the sound

Yourself is the letter "I". So we insert this letter into the gap left by the Y! "Do not change the sound" refers to the letter "Y" which can also have the same sound as "I", so in fact the "I" replaces it leaving BARNIARD. Also, in the final answer "drain" the A+I make a Y sound.

And then move your eyes west and I will be found.

Move your eyes west either means read the entire word from RIGHT to LEFT (thanks @jafe) now the word reads: DRAINRAB. (Even before swapping the Y for I you would have got DRAYN which sounds right - confirming that the AI make the sound of the Y)

But wait — my memory's not straight, rather curved!

Remember! The full word was BARNYARD, so we need to look back at the complete word (or BARNIARD after we swapped the Y for I). This may also refer to the shape of a drainpipe (which is curved, like an 'S-bend', or the 'trap' on a basin or bathtub.

Please order the take-out where refreshments are served.

Refreshments are served in a BAR so we "take-out" the letters B-A-R from the entire word and we are left just the letters DRAIN.

It should all be complete, but my head is all soaked.

RAIN would soak your head, telling us to rearrange the letters this way, but that isn't the complete word. Also the hint points to a drain that would be found in a shower, which soaks your head.

Sometimes there's dirt; sometimes there's smoke!

This is the clue to the word "Drain". Drain pipes are dirty. And apparently smoke can be used to test drain pipes (borrowed from @SMR, who borrowed the answer from me)

Now the crosses have turned — it is time for the running;

The "crosses have turned" refers to taps (faucets for Americans), which often have cross-heads, being turned on. Now water is "running" and going down the DRAIN.

Bubbles are bubbling, and droplets are drumming.

Now that the taps are turned on you are in the shower, enjoying the bubbles and hearing the sound of the water droplets drumming, as water disappears down the DRAIN. (also your hint mentions the shower)

Other clues:

The title: Another New Riddle I Designed

The lead letters A-N-R-I-D are also an anagram of DRAIN. (pointed out by @SMR)

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    $\begingroup$ Could it be rot13(qenva)? That would be an anagram of the acronym of the title and the letter d is also in the word you started from $\endgroup$ – SMR Jul 16 '18 at 9:11
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    $\begingroup$ Sorry, but the answer is incorrect. You are, however, so close — your reasonings for the first line is correct, and the answer rhymes with brain... @SMR is on the right track... The "brain-washed" reference was clever, although incorrect. Once my daily voting limit is over, I will upvote. ;) $\endgroup$ – Feeds Jul 16 '18 at 9:12
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    $\begingroup$ @user477343 Okay I understand it a lot better now. Still one point I'm not 100% sure on but updated my answer. $\endgroup$ – Astralbee Jul 16 '18 at 9:32
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    $\begingroup$ @Astralbee The reasoning for the "refreshments" part is correct, so well done. But some other reasonings are not. That includes the "memory" part. When talking about memory, think of the past $\to$ history $\to$ pipes. And perhaps this might help: the question is Why? Does it sound like anything in particular that might be contained in barnyard? $\endgroup$ – Feeds Jul 16 '18 at 9:48
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    $\begingroup$ The "move your eyes west" part refers to rot13(ernqvat evtug gb yrsg). $\endgroup$ – jafe Jul 16 '18 at 10:47
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The answer is

drain

You must look in a barnyard and forget the question.

Fill the gap with yourself, but do not change the sound;

Borrowing from @Astralbee, barnyard becomes barniard when Y is replaced I, both letters sounding the same

And then move your eyes west and I will be found.

Reading west, i.e., from right to left, yields drainrab

Please order the take-out where refreshments are served.

Removing the letters of bar for drainrab yields drain (again @Astralbee pointed that refreshmend are served in bar and take out means remove from the current "word")

Sometimes there's dirt; sometimes there's smoke!

you can have dirt in drain pipes + smoke testing

Bubbles are bubbling, and droplets are drumming.

you can also have bubbles coming up the drain and drop inside the drain can generate noise

The other sentences are explained by @Astralbee

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  • $\begingroup$ Great job on getting the "smoke" part correct. Your reasoning was exactly what I was thinking of. I was expecting Rot13$[$fgrnz$]$ to be an answer, which I would have accepted as well. ;) $\endgroup$ – Feeds Jul 16 '18 at 9:52
  • $\begingroup$ Sorry I did not accept your answer. Yours is great, but Astralbee's is better in regard to how there is more detail included to more precisely fit the lines of the riddle. If you used a little bit more description, I might have reconsidered... $(+1)$ though :) $\endgroup$ – Feeds Jul 17 '18 at 10:45

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