If you need anything, just let me know—I'll point you in the right direction. Let me start out by counting off our members.

The tall one there is named Martin. He's kinda offensive and always pissing people off. His name is said to mean "Warlike." He's very strong and a solid member of the team.

Over there is Rich. Some people think he's useless, but he's got style. Check out his bling! His wife got him that necklace.

At the far end of the room there is Ponce. There's not much to him, as you can see, but I think he balances us out. Also, he has Paruresis and he's not a Communist.

Now, where's Tyson? He's probably hanging out around here somewhere, off by himself. Don't mess with him, OK? He may be short, and looks kinda fat, right? Don't be deceived: it's all muscle! And he's a fighter, too! He often opposes what we are doing, but he's actually really helpful.

Come to think about it, all our names fit us well, don't you think?

What do you think my name might be, and why?

up vote 29 down vote accepted

I think this story is holding descriptions of the

five fingers.

If you need anything, just let me know — I'll point you in the right direction. Let me start out by counting off our members.

First and foremost you are the index finger, used to point. Fingers are used to count on and the other four members follow ...

The tall one there is named Martin. He's kinda offensive and always pissing people off. His name is said to mean "Warlike." He's very strong and a solid member of the team.

Martin is the middle finger. He's the tallest, and when he sticks up, gives an obscene hand gesture. The middle is a substantial finger. Still looking for a middle connection to warlike/Martin.

Over there is Rich. Some people think he's useless, but he's got style. Check out his bling! His wife got him that necklace.

Rich is the ring finger. I guess he's famous for bling (rings) - if worn, and the necklace may be a wedding band given by his wife.

At the far end of the room there is Ponce. There's not much to him, as you can see, but I think he balances us out. Also, he has Paruresis and he's not a Communist.

Ponce is the pinky finger. He's little (not much to him) but balances as an end digit. Paruresis, a.k.a. bashful bladder (!) may refer to his pink (blush colour) and is not real red (Communist).

Now, where's Tyson? He's probably hanging out around here somewhere, off by himself. Don't mess with him, OK? He may be short, and looks kinda fat, right? Don't be deceived: it's all muscle! And he's a fighter, too! He often opposes what we are doing, but he's actually really helpful.

Tyson is the thumb. He's separated by the purlicue from the other fingers and is tough and squat. Thumb's up to Ian MacDonald for he's a fighter explanation, the contest - One, two, three, four, I declare a thumb war! If pointed down, that's a sign of opposition, and he's useful when gripping.

Come to think about it, all our names fit us well, don't you think?

Thanks to CDspace: the initial and length of the names matches the length of the finger name.

Martin - Middle, Rich - Ring, Ponce - Pinky, Tyson - Thumb.

What do you think my name might be, and why?

For Index, also like CDspace's suggestion Inigo!

  • 3
    Don't forget rot13(Bar, gjb, guerr, sbhe, V qrpyner n guhzo jne!) – Ian MacDonald Jul 12 at 13:20
  • 1
    @Stender, for the name how about rot13(pnyy zr Vfuznry) for a classical reference? :) – m1gp0z Jul 12 at 15:37
  • 2
    Note rot13(gur yratgu bs gur anzrf zngpurf gur yratgu bs gur svatre anzr), so how about rot13(Vfnnp be Vavtb) – CDspace Jul 12 at 16:06
  • 6
    In this case, with Tyson's opposition one might call him opposable – Gramatik Jul 12 at 19:04
  • 1
    "Thumbs up to @IanMacDonald..." Was that pun intended? :) – user477343 Jul 13 at 1:46

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