8
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Heck. I'm stuck, trapped in this cedar madness.
Ash to dust. I'm doomed. I'll fall and look like ketchup.
Anyone, please save me. I want out of this tree, maybe I'll go get a cuppa.
Literally anyone. I think this is a chestnut. Save me, I'll and buy you some liquor?
Perfect I'm falling. Holly heck there's no justice!

What did I say, as I fell?
For the love of God, PLEASE ______ ME!

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  • $\begingroup$ Please do not edit the last line of the question; it changes the author's intent. $\endgroup$ – APrough Feb 14 '18 at 16:00
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Seems almost trivial, but...

The last letters of each line, taken in order, spell SPARE. Which fits the final question. So, you are saying as you fall, "PLEASE SPARE ME!"

Just saw another possibility:

Each line contains the name of a tree: Cedar, Ash, Tree (haha, very funny), Chestnut, and Holly. The first letters of these spell out CATCH, which also fits! "PLEASE CATCH ME!"

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  • $\begingroup$ I think your second one is more realistic. I too noticed the trees, but couldn't string it together meaningfully. $\endgroup$ – Phylyp Feb 13 '18 at 5:40
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    $\begingroup$ Dang! I was half way through typing "nope" to your first answer. But your second guessed hit the nail on the head. Congratz! $\endgroup$ – Asteria Feb 13 '18 at 5:40
  • $\begingroup$ @Asteria: thanks, but I wouldn't award the green tick so soon just so the rest of the community has time to try their hand at this too. And nice puzzle, by the way! $\endgroup$ – Xenocacia Feb 13 '18 at 5:47
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    $\begingroup$ I thought my guess was too simple. @Asteria nice puzzle, love that there are 3 answers in 1 $\endgroup$ – ferret Feb 13 '18 at 6:15
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    $\begingroup$ I also thought the second answer, but for different reasons. I saw the tree names, I saw "Ash... Ketchup" and immediately thought of Pokemon, so that seemed appropriate here. $\endgroup$ – QBrute Feb 13 '18 at 14:00
7
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Please

HAALP

Meeeee!

As spelled out by the first letter of each line. Initially thought the steganography tag was a mistake but it was not!

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  • $\begingroup$ Oh damn, identical answer separated by a few seconds. $\endgroup$ – Phylyp Feb 13 '18 at 5:38
6
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Did you say...

For the love of God, please HAALP me!

Since the

Initial letters of the 5 sentences spell our HAALP, which sounds like "help" when shouted :-)

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  • $\begingroup$ Good guess! but there's a total of 3 "traps" hidden ;) that's number 1 $\endgroup$ – Asteria Feb 13 '18 at 5:39
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    $\begingroup$ “Traps” that feel like perfectly valid answers don’t make a good puzzle :( $\endgroup$ – Timwi Feb 13 '18 at 13:41
  • $\begingroup$ Interesting riddle. Which is the final trap? $\endgroup$ – Alex Feb 13 '18 at 15:09
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    $\begingroup$ @Timwi It's like in the SATs - there might be some valid-looking answers, but the right answer is the "most correct" one. $\endgroup$ – Tacroy Feb 13 '18 at 17:22
  • $\begingroup$ @Timwi "Traps" can be done well, in such a way that it's very clear which answer is the 'correct'/intended one. $\endgroup$ – Rand al'Thor Feb 13 '18 at 23:17

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