The following story describes a famous person:
A failure, that's what I was. Hopping around on one leg all day didn't help with travel, and holding a pen is no easier when you've only got one hand.
The hopping really affected Jessica's sleep. That's why you would frequently see me at the local café. I used to order a decaffeinated mocha there every day; however, the café forgot to restock on straws (for me, anyways), making even a measly drink highly impractical.
I tried to get on a boat. That one left early, and the one after that, and the other after that, all 12 of them left a bit too early for me. I was confused, depressed, suicidal - I had 52 cards, 13 of each suit, with me at all times! I just didn't understand.
However, the clouds were too heavy for their own good, and it started to rain, a rain unlike any other. Soon after the rain came the lightning, and my life changed, for the better, forever.
Who is this short story describing?
Some extra stuff:
- This person is real. They exist(ed) in our world.
- If you provide an answer, please justify your conclusion with relevance to the above story. It's interesting to see not what you came up with, but moreso how you reached that conclusion.