Siri. You are constantly annoying your owner, suggesting things he doesn't want or need.
Me: Knock, knock!
Friend: You love drawing attention to yourself, don't you?
The phone gets a message and makes a sound with two short pings, the phone owner is interrupted and dismissive
Me: Can I ask you for a favor?
Friend: Take off your shoes first.
I don't have an explanation for that one, probably something misheard ("conversation" instead of "off your shoes")?
Me: Would you like a beer?
Friend: As if I haven't mentioned that I don't drink over the phone.
Siri suggests a restaurant or a beer garden, the phone owner didn't want to drink.
Me: Fine, I will type a message.
Friend: You are exhausting me.
The phone misunderstood the next command as the suggestion to write a new text message, and opened the text message function. The friend is exasperated.
The phone likes being held on the shoulder for a conversation
The friend meant "Just go back to listening", telling the phone to shut up
The AI is certainly too dumb to be mistaken as a person, and being software, it doesn't really qualify as a "thing"