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Me: Knock, knock!
Friend: You love drawing attention to yourself, don't you?
Me: Can I ask you for a favor?
Friend: Take off your shoes first.
Me: Would you like a beer?
Friend: As if I haven't mentioned that I don't drink over the phone.
Me: Fine, I will type a message.
Friend: You are exhausting me.
Who am I?
HINT 1:
Me: But your shoulder is so tempting.
HINT 2:
Friend: Just go back to Lisbon.
HINT 3:
I am not a person, and I am vaguely a thing.
I think you are
Tap
Me: Knock, knock!
Who is that tapping on my chamber door?
Friend: You love drawing attention to yourself, don't you?
To tap something means to draw from it.
Me: Can I ask you for a favor?
Tap can mean to obtain money or information from someone.
Friend: Take off your shoes first.
Tap dancing shoes
Me: Would you like a beer?
Beer on tap?
Friend: As if I haven't mentioned that I don't drink over the phone.
To tap a phone means to connect to it so that it can be listened to secretly.
Me: Fine, I will type a message.
Tap typing.
Friend: You are exhausting me.
I'm tapped out!
Hint 1
Tap on the shoulder.
Hint 2
TAP is a Portuguese airline carrier.
Hint 3
A tap can be a thing but, in many contexts, it's not a physical thing.
You are
Siri. You are constantly annoying your owner, suggesting things he doesn't want or need.
Me: Knock, knock! Friend: You love drawing attention to yourself, don't you?
The phone gets a message and makes a sound with two short pings, the phone owner is interrupted and dismissive
Me: Can I ask you for a favor? Friend: Take off your shoes first.
I don't have an explanation for that one, probably something misheard ("conversation" instead of "off your shoes")?
Me: Would you like a beer? Friend: As if I haven't mentioned that I don't drink over the phone.
Siri suggests a restaurant or a beer garden, the phone owner didn't want to drink.
Me: Fine, I will type a message. Friend: You are exhausting me.
The phone misunderstood the next command as the suggestion to write a new text message, and opened the text message function. The friend is exasperated.
Hint1:
The phone likes being held on the shoulder for a conversation
Hint2:
The friend meant "Just go back to listening", telling the phone to shut up
Hint3:
The AI is certainly too dumb to be mistaken as a person, and being software, it doesn't really qualify as a "thing"
You are:
A drive assist (system/app)
Me: Knock, knock!
The app interrupted the silence to draw the driver's attention.
Friend: You love drawing attention to yourself, don't you?
What do you want, drive assistant?
Me: Can I ask you for a favor? Friend: Take off your shoes first.
The drive assist wanted to ask if it could do (not ask) a favor (sometimes drive assistants spell things wrongly). The driver asked it to first turn down the music (take off your shoes = turn down the music).
Me: Would you like a beer? Friend: As if I haven't mentioned that I don't drink over the phone.
Tiresome as these assist are, it keeps asking questions untiringly. The driver reminded the app of his/her preferences. He/She doesn't like beer!!
Me: Fine, I will type a message. Friend: You are exhausting me.
The assist app just won't shut up, now it mistakenly understood that the driver wanted to send a message. The assist might have heard "send (a message) over the phone" from the previous conversation, instead of "(...)drink over the phone".
HINT 1:
Me: But your shoulder is so tempting. Maybe the drive assist app was referring to the seat belt?
HINT 2:
Friend: Just go back to Lisbon. Like saying: you just drive me to Lisbon and stop complimenting me!
