xnor posted his answer as I was writing this, so I decided to go ahead and finish it in any case. I think my solution is a bit more elementary, if more convoluted and less general.
I will show that the maximum possible value for $n$ is $5$. First, we show five is possible.
Let men be $\{A,B,C,D,E\}$ and women $\{a,b,c,d,e\}$, where a man and woman are married if they're the same letter.
- Get $a,b,c$ across, then get $c$ back. ($a,b$ on the other side)
- Get $c,d$ across, then get $d$ back. ($a,b,c$ on the other side)
- Get $A,B,C$ across, get $C,c$ back. ($A,a,B,b$ on the other side)
- Get $C,D,E$ across, get $a$ back. ($A, B, b, C, D, E$ on the other side)
- Get $a,c, d$ across, then get $a$ back. ($A,B,b, C,c, D,d, E$ on the other side)
- Get $a, e$ across.
We now show that $n\geq6$ cannot be done.
An opening move can consist of taking a couple, or one to three women across, but regardless of the situation the only possibility is some women are left on the other side. Now, no men can cross if there are at least four women waiting on the other side. We will show that if three or less women are on the other side, then no solution can be achieved, which completes the proof.
If three women are on the other side and any men cross, then it must be that those three women's husbands crossed. In that case, the only possibility (aside from undoing the crossing) is that a couple comes back. We thus have $k \geq 4$ couples on one side, and two couples on the other side, and must take some people across.
In this situation, any man that goes across must take his woman with him, and any woman that goes across must take her man with her, so the only possibility is a couple going across. But this precisely undoes our last move, so nothing was gained. This is the big difference from $n=5$; when $n=5$, $k=3$ and we could take the three men across, leaving three women behind since no other men were in their presence.
If two women are on the other side and any men cross, then it must be that those two women's husbands crossed. Moreover, no other man or woman may have crossed: the man would leave his wife behind in presence of other men, and the woman would be in the presence of two men in the boat, without her husband.
We thus have $k \geq 4$ couples on one side, and two couples on the other side, and must get some people back. If only men come back, it must be that both men came back, undoing the previous move. If any woman comes back, her husband must also come back, so it must be that a couple comes back. We now have $k \geq 5$ couples on one side, and a single couple on the other side, and must take some people across. This fails exactly as in the previous case ($k \geq 4$ and two couples on the other side).
Finally, if a single woman is on the other side and any men cross, then it must be that her husband crossed. If only he crossed, we have $k \geq 5$ couples on one side and a couple on the other side, and must get some people back. This fails as above.
If more people crossed with him, it must be that another couple did. We now have $k \geq 4$ couples on one side, and two couples on the other side, and must get some people back. Once again, we fall into a previous a failing case.
I think that finding the maximal $n$ was the 'hardest' part of the question, and toying around with it, arguments similar to the ones above will show that the solution I presented uses a minimal number of trips ($m = 11$). There are other ways to reach a solution (particularly the opening moves, leading to having three women waiting on the other side), but in no fewer trips.