You should choose...
...not to worry about it, because it doesn't matter whether you tear up a card or not.
Why?
There are either 101 cards or 100 cards; that's the only difference tearing up a card makes.
In choosing the numbers, we can model the choice of absolute value and the choice of sign as being independent.
Let's say there are $n$ cards. Imagine that first, the absolute values of the numbers are chosen. Then, the sign of the number of smallest absolute value doesn't matter -- it will be sorted to the same place either way, between the positives and negatives; we can just allow the signs of the remaining $n-1$ cards to be chosen, and if they are correctly balanced around our chosen index, we win. Thus, if we index from $1$ and choose index $k$, the chance of winning is $\frac{1}{2^{n-1}} \binom{n-1}{k-1}$ -- in other words, the chance (from the binomial distribution) of having exactly $k-1$ negative numbers from among $n-1$.
Knowing how the binomial distribution behaves, this verifies the intuitive fact that it is better to choose an index nearer the middle.
The result follows from the easily-verified equality $\frac{1}{2^{100}} \binom{100}{50} = \frac{1}{2^{99}} \binom{99}{49}$ -- the chance of winning by choosing index 51 from 101 coins on the left, and choosing index 50 from 100 coins on the right. (I'm sure there a million ways to show this with a nice combinatorial argument, so choose your favorite).