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Cold and dandy, I shuffled inside
Rejecting cheers pealing far and wide.
"Total nonsense!" cried my bitter heart,
"May these festives forever depart."
Cauldron ablaze, my plan in motion
Was ready for its full completion –
Who would have thought a trio of souls
So objected to my noble goals?
Apples, balloons, the first two sported
My life thus far illuminated.
A royal third, foreboding and bleak,
Surrounded by spectral horses sleek,
Lifted me past sordid wisdom's worth
Towards spreading hope and peace on earth.

Who am I?


Jafe has the basic reference right – it's not Scrooge himself, it's someone like Scrooge. Also see line 12.

Remember that I still love MLPFIM.

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@Jafe has spotted the immediate connection between the vibes of this rhyme and:

A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, specifically the visits of the spirits who attempt to persuade him to change his ways.

However, the specific details given in this puzzle point not towards the original novella but to a copycat version entitled:

A Hearth's Warming Tail - episode 8 of season 6 of My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic. In this episode the ponies are preparing to celebrate the Christmas-like holiday of 'Hearth's Warming Eve', but Starlight Glimmer would rather skip all of the festivities. In an attempt to convince her otherwise, Twilight Sparkle tells her a story about a unicorn with a Scrooge-like attitude to the holiday who is visited by spirits in a direct parallel to the Dickens tale.

Specifically, this means that you are Snowfall Frost, 'a powerful yet bitter unicorn who hates Hearth's Warming Eve and values studying and magic above all else' - the main character in Twilight's story.

Cold and dandy, I shuffled inside
Rejecting cheers pealing far and wide.
"Total nonsense!" cried my bitter heart,
"May these festives forever depart."

Within the story, as others prepare to celebrate the holiday Snowfall Frost voices her disgust and desire to skip Hearth's Warming.

Cauldron ablaze, my plan in motion
Was ready for its full completion –
Who would have thought a trio of souls
So objected to my noble goals?

Snowfall then gathers some magical ingredients and prepares a spell which will erase the holiday from existence. However, before she can complete this she is visited by three spirits intent on changing her mind...

Apples, balloons, the first two sported
My life thus far illuminated.

The 'Spirit of Hearth's Warming Past' is portrayed in the story by the MLP character Applejack, whose 'cutie mark' (i.e. identifying tattoo) is three apples.

Meanwhile, the 'Spirit of Hearth's Warming Presents' is portrayed by the character Pinkie Pie, whose cutie mark is three balloons.

Applejack and Pinkie Pie

In parallel to the Dickens story, these two reveal to Snowfall stories from the past and present.

A royal third, foreboding and bleak,
Surrounded by spectral horses sleek,
Lifted me past sordid wisdom's worth
Towards spreading hope and peace on earth.

The third spirit, the 'Spirit of Hearth's Warming Yet to Come', is portrayed by the royal Princess Luna, who shows Snowfall a future where Equestria (their world) is overtaken by windigos - ghostly horse-like creatures.

Once all the visits are complete, Snowfall experiences a Scrooge-like epiphany and changes her ways, showing goodwill to those around her.

The full episode can be viewed gallery-style here.

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  • $\begingroup$ Good job! Writing the riddle to avoid direct references without being too cheesy was the hardest part. rot13(Bar bs zl sheel punenpgref, Fcvaqyr, vf n jvaqvtb jubfr pbybhef jrer gnxra sebz n fprar va guvf rcvfbqr.) $\endgroup$ Feb 9, 2022 at 14:06
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I think you are

Ebenezer Scrooge, the protagonist of Dickens's A Christmas Carol.

Cold and dandy, I shuffled inside
Rejecting cheers pealing far and wide.
"Total nonsense!" cried my bitter heart,
"May these festives forever depart."

Scrooge doesn't like Christmas celebrations, considering the whole thing "humbug" (total nonsense).

Cauldron ablaze, my plan in motion
Was ready for its full completion –

Not sure about Scrooge's plans that Christmas were, nor what the sorcery references here refer to. Will need to come back to this...

Who would have thought a trio of souls
So objected to my noble goals?

Scrooge is visited by three spirits (souls) that try to show him the error of his ways.

Apples, balloons, the first two sported
My life thus far illuminated.

The first two spirits, the ghosts of Christmas past and present, show Scrooge things from his life so far. There's a festive table containing apples and other fruit, and I assume balloons are somehow involved as well?

A royal third, foreboding and bleak,
Surrounded by spectral horses sleek,
Lifted me past sordid wisdom's worth
Towards spreading hope and peace on earth.

The third spirit, the ghost of Christmas yet to come, shows Scrooge what will happen in the future if he doesn't change his behaviour. Scrooge takes the message to heart and starts treating other people with kindness (spreading hope and peace on earth).

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